Should You Adopt Or Not?
Adoption can be considered as another way to have a family, whereby a person assumes the parenting for other person. The parental rights and responsibilities or obligation will be transfer from the biological parents who might be deceased, unable or unwilling to perform their duties as parents. Adoption takes two forms i.e open adoption and closed adoption. Open adoption is defined as the process wherein a biological parents or kin have personal interaction with the adoptive parents. This form of adoption allows biological parents to interact with the child, they may have visitation, exchange of information such as calls or e-mails.While, Closed adoption is defined as the process where there is no interaction between the biological parents and the potential or perspective adoptive parents. It seals the identifying information in confidentiality. However transmittal of medical, religious or ethnic background are allowed. Closed adoption can take the process of Safe Haven Law or Baby Moses Law where the biological parents are encouraged to leave their child anonymously at hospitals, fire departments, or police stations within a few days of birth instead of killing them, discarding or aborting them. This practice is criticized by detractor.
There is pros and cons regarding adoption. If you are placing your own child in adoption, you may encounter many disadvantages such as disappointment when the adoptive parents didn’t meet your needs. They may also become manipulative and used the trust you bestowed making them abused you. There is a feeling of sense of obligation, wherein you want to take part in the life of your child or you want to terminate the process of adoption at any time. There is also disadvantage for the adoptive parents in open adoption. The biological parents might ask the adoptive parents to be more open or ask for more support there will be more stress and pressure. The biological and adoptive family might have a unhealthy relationship due to that.
Moreover, If you are planning to place your child in a closed adoption. here are some of the disadvantage you might encounter. Leaving your child anonymously might possibly give you the feeling of abandonment, grief and guilt making you susceptible with depression because you do not know what happened to the infant after you surrender your rights and obligations.You may also face self-denial because you can not accept the fact that you place your own child at the adoption. Of course there will be disadvantage for the adoptive parents as well in closed adoption, they can have a fear that the biological parents might change their mind and want to have their child back. The information that you acquire prior to adoption is sometimes lacking and you need more as your child is developing.
Basically, If there is a negative and positive aspect for the biological and adoptive parents, there is also a potential pros and cons to the adopted child. with regards to closed adoption the child may have identity confusion because the child lacks interaction and communication with the biological parents. The child may be slightly prone to experience of preoccupation with adoption issues, medical histories, family genealogies are limited. In open adoption the adopted child will not fully assimilate interaction with his adoptive parents because of the presence of the biological parents. The child might feel that his immediate parents rejected him/her, The child may struggle with ways to communicate the various relationships to their peers and the child would feel the pressure who to follow when it comes to authority.
Decision making are essential in adopting or placing your child in adoption. You have to weigh everything and you need to be able to support and accept the outcome of your decision. Do not be afraid to take chances, If you are really willing to adopt, make sure you can handle the responsibility of being a parent, and if you are placing your child in adoption accept that you have already given up your rights and responsibility of being a parent to your child.
Additionally it is important to note, that the risk is worth it. When you adopt this little angels from heaven you just didn’t give them new life but you give them new hope.